Wednesday, November 27, 2019

Is This Mid-Life?

I am writing this from my new home office space that I am in love with and worked hard to create a space that was simple, clean, chic and was everything I wanted. And somewhere that I wanted to spend time and could see out the window and be creative. Alas, new office space. Who needs a kitchen table anyway?


Here is the song I am like right now and how it encapsulates this season of life
Last Hurrah



Well, a couple of months ago, I actually fully entered my 40's. I know, I look like a solid 29, thank you. It's moisturizer, trucker hats and the no kids life plan. My dad is actually only 45, but I have aged him to mid-60's. Kids.

Anyway, upon my friends and I entering our 40's, we all have this same feeling-is this mid-life? It's this mixture of doing bold things and finding your voice and passion and yet, the thought of using your senior discount maybe isn't as far away as we thought....but hey, who doesn't love a discount?

Also, this is a play on the ever-favorite saying "Is this real life?" that you see on social. But, this is more realistic, because it comes with bills.

Upon entering my 41st birthday, I felt a shift. A shift that was creeping up for some time. A call for change. A call to listen to my gut more. A call to follow my passion, which is to really connect with people, listen to their stories, make my community better and well....drink more water. So, the universe pushed me. As it often does and instead of this time ending up on the bathroom floor, I landed with my feed planted firmly. And what an adventure it has been. There have been ebbs and flows. But, what I have found is that my friends are swimming in these waters too. We have this sense of using our voices, putting up with less crap, saying yes to things that are scary and finally saying no to things that don't fill our bucket....like going to that skin care party that your friend does every quarter. I am invested on where I spend my time and who I spend it with. I don't need to put up quizzes that tell people I am this or that, because I will tell you. I need Anna time, I need to see you or I need a food and nap. Unless, it's a quiz on what cheese you would be, that's always a valuable asset.

I invest more in meaningful friendship and partnerships. I spend time and create space that gives me something in return. My friends are on this road trip as well. And it's a spectrum of a tribe. There are friends who haven't saved a penny and then there are friends who have a line item for everything. When we were younger and we heard of a mid-life crisis, it was buying the new car, divorce and spending money on crazy things. Now, at this age, we get it. You want that car-get it. You don't want to wake up next to that person anymore-don't. You want to go eat, pray, love-do it sister. I have left my heart in many parts of the world and it has left it's imprint on me. Book that trip.

I think of my parents, as one does as they look down the tunnel of "what is the meaning of life" and at this age they had a teenage in the house. Can you imagine? Most can, but I can't. I am always wondering where all these dishes and clothes come from and perhaps if someone else was here I would not feel like I eat a lot or it seems change clothes at a fast rate. But, to be responsible for another human? That's just crazy talk and as I remember my parents at this age I have more respect. They showed up everyday to work, to sports and made sure we had everything we needed. They sacrificed and were annoyed by us and yet still fed us.

But, this season of life is interesting and makes me curious of what is to come and being strong enough to handle it. It's the era of being your own hero. Listening to feedback and being okay saying "nah" either out loud or in your head-know your audience here-ha. Or speaking up and saying "wait a minute." It's about being inclusive but also choosing who get's your time and especially if that person hasn't called you or text you to say hi or check in, do not go to their events, watch their stories-give them any of your time. Give time where you get time. Time is our most valuable currency. Spend it wisely. It's about taking meaningful risks and failing fast or flying. Own all of it-each and every decision.


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